Dropping Bombs on Your Mom

Vigilante By Scotty Weeks

The view from the window is quite good, there is always a flurry of activity on the street below. Quinn Smith was a reclusive fellow, he wasn’t always that way but a few years in the big city, away from the warmth of small town life had driven him to isolate a bit. It had been more than a week since Quinn had left the apartment. It was a short trip, he went out for some groceries and made it the entire two blocks to the local IGA and back. Working as a copy writer for a women’s magazine there was never a need to commute any distance that couldn’t be measured in metres.

Quinn amused himself at times by staring out the window at the intersection below. This evening in particular he had spent the last three hours glued to the street dramas. Things were starting to clear out now and there was barely anybody left outside. He’d often pretend that there was an emergency and he’d put himself into the hero’s role. Charging down the stairs, his imaginary self would step in to save the day. Most of the time the emergencies were auto wrecks or senior citizens with heart problems. Quinn was a certified EMT and had never had the chance to use his skills.

Today however, Quinn was feeling fiesty. He imagined a mugging. Ok, he thinks, what’s that man doing? Every hair on his body stands up, he’s riddled with adrenaline and ready for action. He runs down the stairs and grabs the brute right by the head, pulling it back and slamming his elbow into the mugger’s windpipe. Villian dispatched, he picks up the dropped handbag, returning it to the woman with a sly, somewhat rakish smile. A smile that says “Yeah, I can be a manly and rough but I have a charm and seductive intelligence to me, and of course I’m spectacular in bed.” The woman would be obliged to ask him to have coffee—her treat—which would be nice because copy-writers don’t make a lot of money. They’d spend the afternoon blissfully discovering all of the things they had in common, remarking on how lucky it was that they were together and safe.

Quinn caught movement at the northern corner of the street, breaking the spell and interrupting some particularly forward remarks from the young lady he had just rescued. A woman, a very pretty one, was moving quickly toward the street light. There was a man just behind her and in two or three quick steps he caught up. Quinn’s heartbeat quickened and the adrenaline wash started, his arm hair was on end. With a practiced motion the man grabbed the lady’s bag with one hand and punched her in the face with the other. He hit her three times in quick succession and darted off with her purse. The lady stayed there in the foetal position until the police showed up about an hour later.

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Huh?

So yeah, I’m Scott and this is a blahg. It’s mostly about me being super awesome so if you hate things that are rad you should probably skeedaddle.

Who am I? Well as we’ve already determined, my name is Scott. I’m now an ex-expatriate, freshly back in the US after five years in Sydney, Australia. Born and raised in Alaska and now living in New York. It’s nice to be back but I miss Newtown from time to time. This blahg is a bunch of random snippets, shorts, and usual blog-fodder. If you want to contact me, my email is scott dot weeks at gmail.

Oh yeah and all content is © Scott Weeks

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